FAQs

I orgasm quickly with masturbation. I'm concerned when having sex I will orgasm too early. Is there any way I can delay my orgasm?

Answer

Most men experience rapid ejaculation (also called premature ejaculation) several times during their lives and very commonly when they have sex for the first time.

Rapid ejaculation is often caused by anxiety. This often happens for men who are contemplating sex with a new partner where there is a lot of eagerness and over-excitement. The other main cause of anxiety at this time is about performance..."Will I be good enough at this?"

It is great that you masturbate because this gives you the perfect opportunity to find out more about what happens in your body and your mind while you are turned on (aroused) and having sex. It also means you can try out different things without the pressure of anyone else around to make you nervous, and practise to find out what feels good and what works.

Have you tried experimenting with different kinds of pressure and touch, on your penis and other parts of your body? And maybe different kinds of fantasy while you are masturbating to see if any of these have a different effect for you? The mind is actually one of the most important sex organs, so what you are thinking and feeling has a very important influence on how your body responds.

Perhaps focussing less on your penis and genitals during masturbation/sex with someone else, and more on the other parts of your body, will allow you to feel pleasure more broadly all over you body. The whole of your skin is a sex organ that can be very sensitive to touch and pleasure. Trying this may make things feel a whole to different and better, and it might take the stress off your penis and some of the anxiety out of the whole business.

A common method used by men or their partners to delay ejaculation is the 'squeeze technique' Just prior to ejaculation you or your partner need to squeeze the penis between the thumb and 2 fingers just below the area where the head of the penis joins the shaft. You need to squeeze for about 5 seconds, this can be repeated as often as you wish, and are often quite successful.

Wearing a condom can sometimes help prolong an erection and time taken to reach ejaculation?

If you do find that you have a problem there is help available;

There is a telephone line called Impotence Australia that would be useful to ring. They have specially trained counsellors on the line who can speak with you about your difficulties. They can also give you names of counsellors you could see in your area.

Their Australian national number is 1800 800 614 (Sydney number (02) 9280 0084). They have a website too that you could visit http://www.impotenceaustralia.com.au with lots of useful information about sexual difficulties, and a section where you can search for a doctor or counsellor in your area to go and see if you would like to.