FAQs

What’s wrong with me? I used to really want sex as a teenager, and I love my partner. How can I get it back?

Answer

Sex drive or libido is different from one person to the next, and in one person at different times of their lives and depends on a lot of things including:

• age
• gender
• how tired you are
• how busy or distracted you are
(for example,thinking about exams, work or the kids asleep in the next room)
• how your health is
• whether you're taking medication (for example, sometimes hormonal contraception affects your sex drive too)

How you feel about your partner at the moment can have enormous impact - especially if there are relationship difficulties.

Sometimes if a pattern has developed in a relationship of one partner wanting sex more than the other and that has caused tension, then it can increase the problem unless the couple finds ways to work it out.

The most important thing, as well checking there is nothing wrong with your health, is communication with your partner about how each of you feels about what's happening.

Sometimes it's helpful to go to a counsellor to do this to help each partner communicate clearly about what can be a difficult topic and to work on solutions.

Further reading:
Good Loving, Great Sex